Copyright: © 1998 Evangelical Lutheran Church in Canada. This document may be freely reproduced for non-commercial purposes with credit and mention of the Lift Up Your Hearts web site http://www.worship.ca/ as the source.

Pneuma is a journal on spiritual direction and formation in the Evangelical Lutheran Church in Canada. Clement Mehlman edits Pneuma and is currently the Lutheran chaplain at Dalhousie University in Halifax, NS.

In the series of recyclings which are a part of my life, I now find myself a "chaplain" in a university setting. Filled with visions of the catechumenate and spiritual direction, I have become quite reflective about contexts for what Guenther calls "holy listening." While I have been trying to reduce the "noise" of the institutional environment for such listening, I grow more conscious of my inner noise that is a barrier in meeting students and inquirers and directees. My office is quite near the university's counselling services, and there I have met a holy listener named Judy. When I am uncertain about the direction of my counseling/direction of a student, she is always available in spite of her busy schedule.

As I meet with her, I am reminded of all those times in the past when I worked on Rogerian active listening. Judy inspires me and calls me to self-critique. I came across the following from the Mercy Centre in California. I wish I could credit the source and will do so when the author becomes known.

Contemplative Awareness

• Was I mindful of God's presence in this encounter?
• Was I aware of God's presence being revealed in the directee?
• Did I notice the movements of God in their life?
• Did I pause for prayer and silence when needed?
• Was I present in a reverent, compassionate, and non-judgmental manner?
• Did the surroundings help create a sacred space?

Around the Director

• Was I welcoming and hospitable?
• Was I genuine, open, and non-defensive?
• Did I make and maintain appropriate eye contact?
• Was I attentive to my own body language, inner dialogue, and feelings?
• Did I communicate that I heard and received the directee's experience?
• Was I able to be continuously present and responsive?
• Was I comfortable with silence?

Around the Directee

• Did I listen for both content and feelings?
• Was I able to elicit concrete information when necessary?
• Did I explore discrepancies and seek clarifications?
• Did I assist in looking at experiences, behaviours, feelings, and insights?
• Was I able to connect with and use the directee's words, images, metaphors, and symbols?
• Was I able to facilitate the process of going deeper?
• Did I notice non-verbal communication?
• Was I able to reflect back what I heard spoken?
• Did I facilitate looking at what was presented in the light of their deeper desires, needs, and hopes?
• Was I able to help the person name what the invitation or challenge might be?

Checklist of Pitfalls in Spiritual Direction

• Was I too directive?
• Did I fall into the role of parent, teacher, judge, cheerleader, or authority figure?
• Did I lose sight of the inner resources and strengths of the directee?
• Did I forget that the Holy Spirit is the primary spiritual director for this person?
• Was I too talkative?
• Did I ask too many questions out of curiosity, anxiety, or fear of silence?
• Was I discrete and appropriate in sharing my experience?
• Did the spotlight shift to me rather than God's action in the life of the directee?
• Did my own needs dominate the session?
• Did my need to be liked and appreciated or to appear wise and competent interfere with my freedom and attentiveness?
• Did I allow an unhealthy dependency to develop?
• Did my needs for control inhibit this person's exploration of areas that are disturbing or uncomfortable for me? (e.g., tears, pain, fear, sexuality, anger, etc.)
• Was I too emotionally involved with this person?
• Are the problems of the directee destroying my own peace and happiness? Am I weighed down by her or his burdens?
• Am I preoccupied with thoughts and feelings about this person between sessions? (for example, worry, affection, anger).
• Am I troubled by discouragement or a sense of inadequacy?
• Am I disappointed and frustrated by this person's apparent lack of progress?
• Do I really trust that God can work through my weaknesses and powerlessness as well as my strengths and gifts?